are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
