I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Randomize
