next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
