and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize