you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
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The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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