covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
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