Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Randomize
