At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Randomize
