Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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