I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
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