I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
