his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Randomize
