here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
