dude i'm inner monologue high
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
