found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Randomize
