Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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