He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Randomize