Joe is yelling at the trees again.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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