Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
So here I am, sexting at work.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize
