so that wasnt chicken after all
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
pop tarts are not kleenex
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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