quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Randomize
