I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I just want to make out with him forever
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Randomize
