its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize