My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize