I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
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