thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
he shaved USA in his pubs
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
