Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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