I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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