so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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