why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
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