its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Randomize
