you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
