whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
