Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
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