oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
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