he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
