I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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