so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
