If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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