He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
