the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
she smelled like a LAN party
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
