I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Randomize
