I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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