I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Randomize