I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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