Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Randomize
