The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
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