Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Randomize
