I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
