I wish I could teleport
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
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