I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Randomize
